Zonk is your favorite word in the whole wide world. Hearing zonk is like christmas day when you were a kid.
You see, zonk is only really said at one time, and that is morning PT formation. First I will explain morning PT formation. You have been up since 5 am or earlier, it is now 0630, and you are cold and tired. And to the best of your knowledge, you are about to go run 5 miles at a pace that should not be humanly possible. This is just about every normal weekday in the army.
But every once in a blue moon, the first sergeant calls the company to attention as he always does, gets the report as he always does, then grins and yells “ZONK”.
At this point, all hell breaks loose. Imagine black friday at wal-mart. Elbows are thrown, privates are trampled, and war cries bellowed. Utter chaos not seen since the sack of Rome. This is because zonk means go home. As in, “I have decided that today is bullshit, go home until work call”.
Now some of you may be thinking “Thats cool, but why the pandemonium?”
Well, in the military, when you are released from work, you GTFO before someone changes their mind. Plus, its just kind of what you’re supposed to do. Unless you’re a new dick, in which case you are left to wonder WTF just happened. Because nobody ever explains what a zonk is. Ever. You just kind of figure it out.
As for where the word came from, your guess is as good as mine. Its just so beautiful…